(HEART)Virgin

What is purity? What does it mean to be pure? To be un-touched? To be un-polluted? 

Psalm 119:9-11
9 How can a young man cleanse his way? By taking heed according to Your word. 10 With my whole heart I have sought You; Oh, let me not wander from Your commandments! 11 Your word I have hidden in my heart, That I might not sin against You! 

Matthew 5:8
8 Blessed are the pure in heart: for they shall see God.

James 1:27
27 Religion that is pure and undefiled before God, the Father, is this: to visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself untouched by the world.

I always say that in my life God has demonstrated not only His saving power, but His keeping power. 

When I was talking to my friend today he said some things that really caught my attention. First was this:

The same grace that can keep you from stumbling can save you and the same grace that can save you can keep you from stumbling. 

Well, that's cool... But I just kept on thinking about the fact that I had lived a pure life--I was a (HEART)Virgin until March--but then I started dating a guy. I am not pure any longer. I am a virgin, yes, but a (HEART)Virgin? How could I be?

Then I took a look at what the Bible says. Psalm 119:9 says what? So you mean we aren't stuck in sin forever? It can be cleansed? We can be made pure again?

I knew that.... 

Seriously. I did. 

I kept telling people that I knew that God had forgiven me. Saying that I wasn't broken because of the relationship I was in. I feel like God has fully restored me and He has given me back the things that I lost. I feel it in my heart that I am again a (HEART)Virgin. 

But my mind said other things. You aren't pure in heart, it said. You aren't unstained--untouched. Since the word virgin literally means untouched, I was telling myself I couldn't be pure. I had been touched by the world. It was too late. 

But God forgives. His grace isn't only keeping OR saving, it is BOTH! His grace has the power to keep me, to save me when I fall, and to keep me from falling again. 

Hello, my name is child of the one true King
I've been saved, I've been changed, and I have been set free
"Amazing Grace" is the song I sing
Hello, my name is child of the one true King
-Matthew West

I believe that. It is true for me and it is true for you.

I am a child of the one true King. I am a princess. I have been set free. I have been REDEEMED! I am made new. And from now on, I am a (HEART)Virgin. My next first kiss will be on my wedding day, and my saving and keeping God will save and keep me until then and for forever.

Journal Entry 6-11-13

As I sat this morning under my tree by Oasis chapel this morning I looked into the woods. In front of me I saw the first few steps of a path otherwise hidden from view. To the right was a tangled mess of sticks, brambles, trees, thorns, etc. – another path . . . but there was no cleared way.

A cloud had settled over camp, so to the left I could see the playground. Beyond it was as though nothing else existed because of the fog. Behind me I could see where I had come from.

I feel like that’s where I am right now. God’s path is before me. It leads into the woods and I can’t see the end, but he wants me to trust him.

To the right is the wrong path – obviously wrong. An ugly, sinful choice.

To the left is the playground. It would be fun to go there. It wouldn’t be scary because I can see everything that is there. There may be some slight thrills where I would have a chance to spook . . . falling off something or spinning on the merry-go-round . . . but that’s all it would be.

Behind me I can see where I’ve come from. It’s a mess of choices – good and bad – that have brought me to this place where I am.

As I sit in the cross roads, in this peaceful stillness for a moment, I know which path to take. I need to take the first few steps on that path into the beautiful green wood. I can’t see where it will lead, but I have a guide who has seen the end. I need to trust him that it is good and that he will get me there.

So I will. I embark on a new journey. There are difficulties, but I will make it and they will be more that worth it at the end even if the only good thing to happen is that I learn to know my Guide.