Skewed Perception

I woke up this morning to fighting voices. I went to sleep soon after arguing about homosexuality with someone I didn't even know on the internet. What is happening!? Does everyone not realize that this is Easter? Tomorrow commemorates the day that Jesus won over death and the grave! Today commemorates a day that He was walking through Hell for us. Why can't we remember that? Where is the gratitude? Since when is it more important that everyone have the correct opinion about gay marriage that it is that our God sent His Son to Earth--to this mess--to save us (SINNERS) from eternal separation from Him?

But on the first day of the week, at early dawn, they came to the tomb, bringing the spices which they had prepared. And they found the stone rolled away from the tomb, but when they entered, they did not find the body of the Lord Jesus. And it happened that while they were perplexed about this, behold, two men suddenly stood near them in dazzling apparel; and as the women were terrified and bowed their faces to the ground, the men said to them, "Why do you seek the living One among the dead? He is not here, but He has risen. Remember how He spoke to you while He was still in Galilee, saying that the Son of Man must be delivered into the hands of sinful men, and be crucified, and on the third day rise again." And they remembered His words, and returned to from the tomb and reported all these things to the eleven and to all the rest. Now they were Mary Magdalene and Joanna and Mary the mother of James; also the other women with them were telling these things to the apostles. And these words appeared to them as nonsense, and they would not believe them. But Peter arose and ran to the tomb; stooping and looking in, he saw the linen wrappings only; and he went away to his home, marveling at that which had happened. -Luke 24:1-12 NIV

"Do not be alarmed," He told them. "You are looking for Jesus the Nazarene, who was crucified. He has been resurrected!! He is not here! See the place where they put Him. -Mark 16:6 HCSB

And this is the promise which He Himself made to us: eternal life. -1 John 2:25 NIV

For God loved the world in this way: He gave His One and Only Son, so that everyone who believes in Him will not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send His Son into the world that he might condemn the world, but that the world might be saved through Him. John 3:16-17 HCSB

For if the dead are not raised, not even Christ has been raised; and if Christ has not been raised, your faith is worthless; you are still in your sins. Then those who have fallen asleep in Christ have perished. If we ave hope in Christ in this life only, we are of all men most to be pitied. But now Christ has been raised from the dead, the first fruits of those who are asleep. -1 Corinthians 15:16-20 NIV

THIS is what we should be remembering today. The God who made the universe cares for you. He cares for all of us. He sent His Son to die for us. Jesus could have called 10,000 angels to save Him. He could have done any number of things. He didn't have to die for us. He didn't have to go through crucifixion. He didn't have to go through Hell. But He wanted to, because if He did He knew that we could one day be with Him in paradise.

Happy Easter, my friends.

Trust

Why is it so much easier to trust God with our eternity than with our simple, day-to-day needs? You know it's true though. We give God the trust He requires to take our souls once we die, but we shy away from the thought that we should trust Him with finances, food, shelter, relationships, and other material needs. It's almost like we don't think He is big enough for them or something.

In the book Out of the Black Shadows by Stephen Lungu there are many stories of trust. Something Stephen's friend and teacher Johann found great importance in teaching was this idea of trusting God with all of one's needs. He even took it to the extent that he wouldn't tell someone when he was in need of something. Being a missionary in Africa there were many times when he was in need, but still he trusted God rather than asking for help.

Stephen was taught to do the same. There was a time he needed soap. He went to Johann to ask for more, but he was informed that there was no money and he would just have to pray to God for soap. This was Stephen's first experience with Johann's "trust God for everything" policy. And he wasn't sure he liked it. But, since Johann wouldn't get him soap he set to praying for it. He prayed all day for soap. The next day a neighbor came by and dropped off a bag of groceries. They said the had been to town and thought that the mission could use a gift. Stephen took the bag and, once the neighbor left, hurriedly took out every item until he saw at the bottom not one, but two bars of soap.

He was ecstatic. He could hardly believe that God had cared to provide soap. It was such a little thing, but God still bothered to take care of it. It had to be God. He hadn't told anyone that he needed it.

Later on he had an important letter to mail, but he had no stamps. Again he went to Johann to ask for stamps, and again Johann said that he needed to pray to God and trust him for the stamps because there were none in the mission. So Stephen prayed for stamps. I think this time he prayed for a few days. One day a friend came over to visit Johann. As he was leaving he asked to speak to Stephen and handed him a white envelope along with his greeting before he left. Inside the envelope was not a stamp, but instead a banknote--one that was said to be more than enough for thousands of stamps.

Once again Stephen was in need. He needed shoes. His had worn through, and again the mission could not provide him new ones. A rich young man came to visit and took Stephen with him as a guide in town. When they got there the young man asked Stephen what they were shopping for. Stephen looked at him, confused. The man explained that he wanted to buy Stephen something, but he wasn't sure what he needed. Again, Stephen had been praying (this time for weeks, if I remember) for God's provision, and again God came through and provided. He provided what was needed and He gave in excess. Stephen came home with a pair of shoes, two shirts, and a pair of trousers.

Have you seen God's provision? I think that a lot of times we cheat God out of the opportunity to do things like this because we are so quick to pronounce our need, and so hesitant to wait for Him. It's likely many of us haven't seen this provision, but it isn't because God hasn't been providing. If you are alive, God has provided.

Challenge to you: Give God the opportunity to show Himself to you in this way throughout the next month. I assure you, if you open your eyes to it you will not be disappointed. It will show up like those pennies I talked about--everywhere--as a testament to the providence of our Awesome God.

In the Heart

This winter I realized that I am not a nice person. The words I say are so often cutting it isn't even cool. Sarcasm is one thing; in my hands, however, it is a different thing entirely. I have this knack for noticing things about people. I might dare to call it a gift. It's just a touch of extra insight. Funny thing about gifts, though, is that they can be used for good or used for bad. I was using mine for bad, and I really didn't realize it. 

All of a sudden I realized it. There were things I was saying that were just. . . . off. The words I was saying weren't always bringing glory to God, and that was a problem. I started seeing that I was hurting people I never meant to hurt. I would quickly notice it and try to turn it around, but the thing about words is that they don't come back. Once said always said. 

I had often read this passage from James always thinking it applied to someone other than myself. Well, it applies to me as well. 

"Now when we put bits into the mouths of horses to make them obey us, we also guide the whole animal. And consider ships: Though very large and driven by fierce winds, they are guided by a very small rudder wherever the will of the pilot directs. So too, though the tongue is a small part of the body, it boasts great things. Consider how large a forest a small fire ignites. And the tongue is a fire. The tongue, a world of unrighteousness, is placed among the parts of our bodies. It pollutes the whole body, sets the course of life on fire, and is set on fire by hell. 

Every sea creature, reptile, bird, or animal is tamed and has been tamed by man, but no man can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. We praise our Lord and Father with it, and we curse men who are made in God's likeness with it. Praising and cursing come out of the same mouth. My brothers, these things should not be this way. Does a spring pour out sweet and bitter water at the same opening? Can a fig tree produce olives, my brothers, or a grapevine produce figs? Neither can a saltwater spring produce fresh water." -James 3:3-12 HCSB

If the words coming from our mouths are not wholesome, what does that say about our hearts? According to  Luke 6:45:

"A good man produces good out of the good storeroom of his heart. An evil man produces evil out of the evil storeroom, for the mouth speaks what the heart if full of."

What is in our hearts is what comes from our mouths. Other versions say: Out of the overflow of the heart, the mouth speaks. I don't want that garbage in my heart. And I don't want to be saying it. 

I think this relates as well to the way that we should handle people we disagree with and our enemies as well as our friends and those that we are close to. People see the way we are acting and know (even without reading it in the Bible) that those of us who are acting like we have love in our hearts actually have love inside of us, and those who act as though we have garbage in our hearts really do have garbage inside of us. 

I like the way the NIV says it best:

"Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen." -Ephesians 4:29

Believe me, I know it is hard. There are people out there that we just don't want to be kind to. We don't want to turn the other cheek. We don't want to walk that extra mile. We don't want to hand over both our coat and our shirt. Why should we? They haven't given us all the respect we deserve. But we aren't called to act like everyone else. We are called to rise above that and follow the example of our perfect Lord and Savior. And believe me, when you know in your heart that you are doing the right thing it is satisfying. It is not easy, though it becomes more so as you practice it, but it is right. And relationships are built and rebuilt on the love that is shown through this. 

I'm trying. Not doing perfectly. . . . But then, I am human. I never will attain perfection. For those of you who I have hurt, I am so sorry. For those of you I am sure to hurt in the days to come, please forgive me. And please feel free to call me out. I know that this is a problem, and I am working on it. God help me. 

My All

Fill me up. It's been a theme throughout the past few weeks. Today was difficult for me, and as I was trying to go through it God put a song in my head and it stayed there for quite a while. 

You are my strength when I am weak

You are the treasure that I seek 

You are my all in all 

Seeking You as a precious jewel

Lord, to give up I'd be a fool

You are my all in all

Jesus, Lamb of God

Worthy is Your name

Jesus, Lamb of God

Worthy is Your name

Taking my sin, my cross, my shame

Rising again I bless Your name

You are my all in all

When I fall down You pick me up

When I am dry You fill my cup 

You are my all in all

(YOU ARE MY ALL IN ALL)

Sometimes I really just need that reminder; to know that God is there and that He is providing what I need, even if it isn't exactly what I want. Today (though it took a long time) I was able to remember that. And it wasn't a bad day at all (:

Just Notice

Have you ever watched the stars? Like, seriously watched them. Have you ever taken the time to lay on your back in the grass and just stare at them for hours? Have you ever seen a shooting star? Ever seen a meteor? Let me tell you, if you haven't done this you are seriously missing one of the best things in life. 

What about summer days on the beach. My favorites days are the ones when the wind is blowing like anything and the red flag waves proudly as an ally to the wind to announce that the waves are too strong and too high for one to consider cavorting with. I do it anyway.

Have you watched the leaves blow in the autumn? Have you seen the twisters that form just before they shoot off into the sky? Have you watched as a summer breeze ripples a pond, or the grass and flowers surrounding it? Have you climbed to the top of the tallest tree you could find? Have you watched eagles soar? 

I guess what I am really asking is, have you known freedom? Have you seen the love in the beauty of the world God has given to us? Take a minute to notice it sometime. 

"Aren't two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them falls to the ground without your Father's consent." -Matthew 10:29 HCSB

"If that's how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and thrown into the furnace tomorrow, won't he do much more for you--you of little faith?" -Matthew 6:30 HCSB

"Consider how the wildflowers grow: They don't labor or spin thread. Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendor was adorned like one of these!" -Luke 12:27 HCSB

When we consider the creation that is all around us and the care God took in making it, we should know that He cares for us.

May you all be richly blessed today.

Like a Broken Jar

Honestly, right now I just don't know what to write. I keep trying to think of something deep and moving; some little bit of insight; something that I just can't keep inside of me and want to share with the world. . . . . . but there's nothing. I don't understand. I usually have no problem writing. 

I wrote something back in December that seems to fit for today. Here it is. Yes, it's slightly outdated, but the lessons in it are as applicable as they were then. 

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Ok, wow. So, life throws curve balls. This past month has been killer. I honestly wonder sometimes how I survived it--how I am not dead from exhaustion and stress. But yet, here I am. And I have learned. So. Much.

When a friend asks you to tell him the good things that have happened to you that day, or the blessings that you have, and you can only list two--and that with difficulty--you can be assured that something isn't right. A few weeks ago that was where I was. 

Since then, I've learned that when life is dark, there is still sunshine. Just because you can't see it doesn't mean it isn't there. Maybe there are clouds. It's just covered up for a while. My newest dear friend, Jennifer, asked me the other day what was good about gray skies. She was trying to get me to think positively, I think. Living in Michigan and seeing gray skies 323 days a year doesn't make one very optimistic about them. So, when she asked me, I couldn't tell her what was good about them. There was nothing, as far as I could tell.

I thought about it for a while. When people ask me a question I tend to think about it until I find an answer. I finally got it more than 12 hours later. Yeah, sometimes these things take me a while. But I got it. If there were only sunny days, would we appreciate them? That was my answer. Gray skies are good because they make us thankful for the sun.

That thought reminded me of something I read one time. It was in the book Out of the Silent Planet by C.S. Lewis. One of the characters made a profound statement when things weren't going well and it has stuck through many years. "And I say also this. I do not think the forest would be so bright, nor the water so warm, nor love so sweet, if there were no danger in the lakes." And he was right. 

I've learned other things as well: Sometimes you have to lose things to appreciate them. Sometimes we have to make a painful choice, knowing that it is for the best. Sometimes things end, and though it is hard, we have to remember them anyway. We can't go through life remembering only the good things and forgetting the bad. If we did that, the good things would stop looking good and we would have nothing in the end at all. 

Something else... We need to wait. We need to trust God and have faith that He knows what is best. That He has His perfect plan for our life in His sight. If we go through life ready and waiting until we hear Him calling us, or sense Him saying, "Now is the time to go," then we will see that His plans are perfect. 

But then, in juxtaposition, there are times when we don't hear or feel anything that we know is Him telling us to do something. Those times can be hard. He feels distant at times. But He isn't. He s always right there beside you. However, if you look the other way, you aren't going to see Him. 

A book I just read said that we aren't always going to know when God speaks to us. I know that is true. We go through life making excuses, saying, no...that wasn't God speaking. That was the devil putting ideas in my head--why would God have me do something dangerous? Something that hurts? Or no, God didn't tell me to do that. It was just some random idea I thought up. Those excuses, and I will be the first to admit that I make them all the time, are a big part of what distances us from God and His plans for our lives. Maybe we should consider just doing the things we are reasonably sure we should do--without making the excuse that "maybe God didn't tell me to."

It's funny how He works when you do. For more than a year I have been refusing to lead a Bible study. I made so many excuses: I don't have time, no one will be interested, I don't know what I would teach, and my main one . . . . I am not fit to teach anyone anything. Why on earth would you want me to be the one?

I think God chuckled the other day when I finally gave in. He laughed to himself saying, "Silly child. She has no idea. I can wait forever for her . . . but if she would only do what I am calling her to do she would see so much more of my fullness and my love and my wonder . . . Oh dear, silly child."

I'm sure that's what He was thinking. Amazed at how stubborn I was, not wanting to do what I knew I should do. Laughing at my excuses in much the same way He likely laughed at Moses when he claimed he couldn't speak, or David who was too small to be of any use, or Samuel who became the first to hear God speak in a long, long time, or Esther who was made queen though she was of the same people who were being persecuted, or Ruth--an outsider made into part of the lineage of Jesus. . . And so many others. Everyone God used was someone who the world looked at and said, "No, they will never ________________."

Why would God use broken people? Honestly? He uses broken people because it is through the broken people that His light can shine into the world. Hey, I like that analogy. . . He is like a light, and we are like a clay jar. When we have it all together, the world can't see Him--it can only see us. But when we are broken, and we stop trying to hold together the pieces to make the world think that we can do it on our own, then, and only then, can the world see that we have a light in us--and oh, what a marvelous light!

My excuses are worthless when compared to this.

Forgotten Goodness

Have you ever thought about the sheer amount of things that we ignore? For example, I would be willing to bet you walked past at least one, if not quite a few pennies today. Did you see them? Did you pick them up? Probably not.

I found a penny today, and it, along with two others, joined the proud collection of bright copper coins in the bowl on my dresser. Why collect pennies? It's a good question, honestly; one that I believe I have an equally decent answer to. 

I collect pennies because they are forgotten. They are overlooked, ignored, and undervalued. I collect them because someone showed me once how similarly we overlook God's grace and goodness. 

There are times in my life when I feel like I am about to run out of strength to carry on. When I know without a doubt that I can not take the next breath on my own, let alone complete whatever other tasks were laid before me. 

There are times when the world will get you down; when we are scared, confused, weak, helpless. Sometimes in these moments it is easy to forget all the good things God has done for  you. It's easy to wonder if we'll get through it, let alone how. I know. I was in that place just last night, and for a time before. We forget all the times that God has come through in the past and question if He will come through now. But, as Matt Westerholm reminded us in chapel today, "if He's taken care of you in the past, He's going to take care of you in this current season." God is not going to leave us now. He never did before. 

Joshua was charged by Moses in Deuteronomy 31:6 to "Be strong and courageous; don't be afraid or terrified of them. For it is the LORD your God who goes with you; He will not leave you or forsake you." Again in verse 7 he says to have courage and in verse 8 he repeats: "The LORD is the One who will go before you. He will be with you; He will not leave you or forsake you. Do not be afraid or discouraged."

God doesn't leave us. He's been here the whole time, and He will stay here with us forever. Kind of like these pennies. They are all around us just waiting for someone to notice them. 

I collect pennies because they give me hope. My life is laced with these reminders that God is good. That He is faithful. "I need the reminders. I need to be told that He was faithful then, and then, and then. Just because I've forgotten how to see it doesn't mean it isn't there. His goodness is there. His promises have been kept. All I need to do is see." (Shauna Niequist--Cold Tangerines) And when I hold these pennies in my hand, I remember all the times that God has been faithful. That He has stood with me in the moment. Each penny stands for a time that I saw God's grace--and yet there are a million more times that I was surrounded by it and didn't even see it.

Sometimes, when I look around, I'll see one. Since I started collecting them they always make my heart smile. God's grace is like pennies. And it's everywhere. 

Palm Trees Grow in Desserts

"The Scriptures say that the righteous shall flourish like the palm tree--but we need to remember that palm trees don't grow in beautiful forests, but in the desert. We are called to bear fruit--but we must recognize that the fruit tree grows in valleys, not on mountaintops." (Tim Hansel-You Gotta Keep Dancin')

I find that an interesting thought. God is always saying in His word to bear fruit, but I hadn't realized how often the fruit bearing trees on this earth are stuck in places that might be considered less desirable than some other option. We are expected to bear fruit even when we are walking through valleys and deserts in our lives. 

I guess that's a good thing. As a Christian if we aren't struggling we are probably doing something wrong. If the devil doesn't have to attack us to keep us from bearing God's fruit--because we aren't bearing it anyway--he might just let us believe everything is good. 

That might be one of the most dangerous things when it comes to faith. An easy life can easily make us believe we are capable of doing it on our own--something that is so far from the truth.

As spoken by Jesus, quoted by John, "If the world hates you, understand that it hated Me before it hated you. If you were of the world, the world would love you as its own. However, because you are not of the world, but I have chosen you out of it, the world hates you. Remember the word I spoke to you: 'A slave is not greater than his master.' If they persecuted Me, they will also persecute you. If they kept my word, they will also keep yours." -John 15:18-20 HCSB

We are not of this world. In that case, we should rejoice in our sufferings because the world that hated our Lord hates us in the same way and for the same reason.

"And not only that, but we also rejoice in our afflictions, because we know that afflictions produces endurance, endurance produces proven character, and proven character produces hope. This hope will not disappoint us, because God's love has been poured out in our hearts through the Holy Spirit who was given to us." -Romans 5:3-5 HCSB

So we should "Rejoice always! Pray constantly. Give thanks in everything, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." -1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 HCSB 

Joy vs. Happiness

Lately, many things have been on my mind. One of the more constant thoughts is that I need to write. I need to journal. I need to blog. I just need to write. I have things to say, and though there are many times when people don't want to listen I still want to speak. So, here we go. Post #1 on my new blog (the last one was deleted because of inactivity...). Let's see if I can keep this one up and running.

Today I feel like writing about joy; joy and happiness. Something that I have realized is that people can't tell the difference between the two. It's either that or they wonder why they can't be happy. Why, though they are certain they know what they want, do they never feel satisfied once they get to it?

I was reading a book for class last week and one of the things the author made a point of throughout the book was joy. Specifically, something he said was that if we spend our whole life needing to be ten feet from where we are in order to be happy we will never attain happiness.

Happiness is situational. It is based on happenings. In fact, it comes from the same root word as the word happen does. With happiness, you need situations to be good. Life needs to be going well. You need to have this thing or that thing...and it goes away in a minute. Joy, on the other hand is quite different.

Joy is a choice. It is a simple choice. It's a lifestyle; a faith; a way of being. You can choose to know joy or not to. It is more a definition of who you are than of what you have. It has more to do with your attitude than the condition of your body or other physical situations. 

It's interesting. We, or at least I know I often do, go through life hoping for that one thing . . . saying "if only" more often than "thank you."

The other day as I wrote I began to think about the relationship status I have had until this year. This month, actually. . . Until this month I had not been "in a relationship" with anyone. It was partially for the reason I mentioned above. I didn't want to rely on a person for my happiness. The other reason was similar; I wanted to trust God first and only. That place doesn't belong to any human.

Now, don't get me wrong. Ryan is one of the greatest things that has happened to me. He is a strong man of God. He cares for and respects me. He knows how to make me smile and laugh, and I very much enjoy every single minute I spend with him. But Ryan knows this too, and he agrees with me. God needs to come first in a relationship. He needs to come first in life. He needs to come first in everything.

Ryan makes me happy, but God gives me joy. And the joy I find in the Lord will never leave me. Even on days like today when, as I look out the window on this first day of spring, I see a blizzard of sorts and snowbanks and drifts unlike any we should be seeing in spring. Even when homework overwhelms me; when the drama of friendships tires me; if Ryan were ever to leave me. . . . I could still have joy in knowing that my Jesus loves me.