In the Heart

This winter I realized that I am not a nice person. The words I say are so often cutting it isn't even cool. Sarcasm is one thing; in my hands, however, it is a different thing entirely. I have this knack for noticing things about people. I might dare to call it a gift. It's just a touch of extra insight. Funny thing about gifts, though, is that they can be used for good or used for bad. I was using mine for bad, and I really didn't realize it. 

All of a sudden I realized it. There were things I was saying that were just. . . . off. The words I was saying weren't always bringing glory to God, and that was a problem. I started seeing that I was hurting people I never meant to hurt. I would quickly notice it and try to turn it around, but the thing about words is that they don't come back. Once said always said. 

I had often read this passage from James always thinking it applied to someone other than myself. Well, it applies to me as well. 

"Now when we put bits into the mouths of horses to make them obey us, we also guide the whole animal. And consider ships: Though very large and driven by fierce winds, they are guided by a very small rudder wherever the will of the pilot directs. So too, though the tongue is a small part of the body, it boasts great things. Consider how large a forest a small fire ignites. And the tongue is a fire. The tongue, a world of unrighteousness, is placed among the parts of our bodies. It pollutes the whole body, sets the course of life on fire, and is set on fire by hell. 

Every sea creature, reptile, bird, or animal is tamed and has been tamed by man, but no man can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. We praise our Lord and Father with it, and we curse men who are made in God's likeness with it. Praising and cursing come out of the same mouth. My brothers, these things should not be this way. Does a spring pour out sweet and bitter water at the same opening? Can a fig tree produce olives, my brothers, or a grapevine produce figs? Neither can a saltwater spring produce fresh water." -James 3:3-12 HCSB

If the words coming from our mouths are not wholesome, what does that say about our hearts? According to  Luke 6:45:

"A good man produces good out of the good storeroom of his heart. An evil man produces evil out of the evil storeroom, for the mouth speaks what the heart if full of."

What is in our hearts is what comes from our mouths. Other versions say: Out of the overflow of the heart, the mouth speaks. I don't want that garbage in my heart. And I don't want to be saying it. 

I think this relates as well to the way that we should handle people we disagree with and our enemies as well as our friends and those that we are close to. People see the way we are acting and know (even without reading it in the Bible) that those of us who are acting like we have love in our hearts actually have love inside of us, and those who act as though we have garbage in our hearts really do have garbage inside of us. 

I like the way the NIV says it best:

"Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen." -Ephesians 4:29

Believe me, I know it is hard. There are people out there that we just don't want to be kind to. We don't want to turn the other cheek. We don't want to walk that extra mile. We don't want to hand over both our coat and our shirt. Why should we? They haven't given us all the respect we deserve. But we aren't called to act like everyone else. We are called to rise above that and follow the example of our perfect Lord and Savior. And believe me, when you know in your heart that you are doing the right thing it is satisfying. It is not easy, though it becomes more so as you practice it, but it is right. And relationships are built and rebuilt on the love that is shown through this. 

I'm trying. Not doing perfectly. . . . But then, I am human. I never will attain perfection. For those of you who I have hurt, I am so sorry. For those of you I am sure to hurt in the days to come, please forgive me. And please feel free to call me out. I know that this is a problem, and I am working on it. God help me.