We've Moved!

I've purchased a domain and moved my blog! Please visit me at www.simplylifeblog.net. All past and future content will be available there. Thank you for all your support--it has allowed me to get this far!

Recipe: Green Salsa

No huge, life-changing insights today. I want to share with you a favorite recipe. I've made it a few times now, and every time I make it I wonder why green salsa is so under-rated. Either that or it's under-created... I know so many people who LOVE green salsa. I know maybe two people who make it. 

People....this is a problem. ;)

I'll cut to the chase. Here's the recipe. I don't know how to do the fancy recipe files, so you'll have to bear with me and just read it like regular blog post content. 

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Green Salsa
Makes 4-6 cups salsa

Ingredients:
8 tomatillos, husked and rinsed
1 small yellow onion, peeled and coarsely chopped
2 teaspoons minced garlic
4 ounces green chiles (one can)
1/4 cup (I use more) fresh cilantro
1 jalapeno, seeded
salt

Broil the tomatillos, onion, and jalapeno in the oven for 5-10 minutes or until blackened. (You don't want to miss out on the awesome flavor this adds to the salsa!)

Place all ingredients in your blender or food processor and process until soupy. 

It will be quite warm from the broiled ingredients. Chill in the refrigerator a few hours until cool. Then serve with tortilla chips and enjoy! 

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If you prefer your salsa quite hot, there are a few things you can do. Leaving the seeds in your jalapeno is probably the easiest option. You could add another jalapeno. Or, as I recently learned, the jalapenos with the spidery brown scars all over them are hot, and the pretty and smooth all-green ones are mild. Who knew!? So if you're not a fan of heat, choose a smooth one, and if you love that heat in your salsa, choose one with a bit of brown on it. 

Moving -- and "Crusty Hospitality"

I read an author/blogger/woman once who wrote of this thing she called crusty hospitality. (I swear I am not trying to withhold credit and I searched her to see if I could link to her article, but I can't find it. If you know the woman of whom I speak, please let me know and I will edit this post to include her!) Basically, as I remember it, her crusty hospitality was the mindset that we should just welcome people into our lives -- without having to "clean up" first. 

I guess it's like we always say that Jesus asks us to come as we are. Growing up I always had it explained to me that you don't take a bath before you jump in the shower. You just shower. This author wanted to invite people to come as they were, so she also came as she was. 

So many times I think we fail to invite people into our lives because we aren't "ready for company." We were raised by well-meaning mothers who taught us to clean-clean-CLEAN and stuff things in closets and scrub and wash and vacuum and make-perfect before company arrived. It was always days of hassle and stress, and then the harried rush to hide away anything that had been missed. 

It really didn't make us want to have guests... But at least the house got cleaned. Mostly. 

I am currently in the process of moving. I live in a small apartment (perhaps large as apartments go, but it is small for a family living space). I have boxes piled floor to ceiling and almost literally coming out my ears. I can't walk in my bedroom (we just had guests for dinner and I needed the table and dining room). 

I was on the phone with my mother and mentioned that I was having dinner guests over for homemade pizza. She had seen the state of my home and congratulated me on being able to invite people into my mess. Thanks, Mom. But really, I wonder if that should deserve congratulations at all. I honestly feel like we should work harder at making people feel welcome instead of working harder on making our home look like a magazine. I feel like we should not expect when we are offered a meal at someone else's table that they will have a home that looks like that magazine either. 

When we allow ourselves to be messy, we are able to welcome people into our real lives. When we allow them to be messy we speak a message that says, "I am not here for the food or the house, I am here because I value you."

I was going to made homemade pizza crust and we were going to have a fine night of great food and good times. But life and moving and my poor sick baby wouldn't allow for that. So, I bought two loaves of Italian bread and we sliced it up and made pizza on that. We ate at a newly cleared table surrounded by filled moving boxes. We placed our used dishes on a counter that already held many others. And the food was good. And the company was good. And the conversation was good. And we were all able to be real because in the space where I really do life I invited my friends in to do life with me too. 

Sometimes we need to share what's left in the fridge. Don't let that stop you from building friendships. 

Sometimes we have to move laundry so that your friend has a place to sit. Don't let that stop you from sharing your home.

Sometimes the food is burned. 
Sometimes you haven't dusted in months. 
Sometimes you have boxes on boxes and there isn't really room to kick them aside. 

Don't allow this to keep you from sharing life with the people you need to be sharing life with.

This is crusty hospitality. 

If you're worried they won't come again after they see how you share, then they were there for the food or the house, not the conversation and the friendship. If they are there for you, the food won't matter, the house won't matter, the baby's attitude won't matter. 

And it will be blessed. 


**Side note: If I waited until I had it all under control, I would never have guests over again. You too?**

Purposeless and Empty

Disclaimer: If you're looking for something to read that will brighten your day, I'm not sure that this is the one. 

Last time I wrote that we are "without excuse" and that I am "trying again." Turns out "trying again" isn't so easy after all. I was all "gung-ho" about it...and then, well, life. 

I think I might start a recipe blog. Or a sewing blog. Or something that requires a little less of "me" and a little more of stuff I do. 

That won't really happen. It's just how I'm feeling. 

Charlie is my best friend, at the moment. I'm not sure what I would do without the little bugger. She's my smiles, she is my purpose. She is my company. She is my friend. It's a big role for such a little person to fill. . . . But she does. Every time she sleeps I miss her. I hardly know what to do with myself. 

Isn't she cute? 

Lately, though, I've been feeling that aside from Charlotte Jayne, I don't have a purpose. I feel like an old, dried husk. Who am I? What am I? I don't even think I know. 

I sew. Sometimes. . . . Actually, what I really do is start things. I start lots of things. And I don't finish many of them. I have a partial skirt. I have a dinosaur toy I never sewed eyes onto. I have the fabric and notions for Charlie's Christmas gift, but I never even drew the pattern. I have 2.5 yards of pink minky and matching thread to make into a blanket for someone. I have 2 partially sewn baby boots that I may or may not finish before the snow melts again. 

I cook. Often, actually. I like to do that. But lately I feel like I have been cooking one huge thing. . . . .and then we eat it left over for days while I don't cook. 

I take photos. Actually, no. I don't really do that. I take photos of Charlie, but business photos don't really seem to be a thing. Someday, maybe. 

I run a facebook group called Buy Nothing. That's pretty cool. It gives me a bit of fulfillment to see that something I am doing is helping others. 

I don't clean much. I don't do the dishes much. I don't often do the laundry. I don't take out the trash. I don't hang out with friends. I don't really do anything but be a mommy to my baby. Now, please, before you all comment saying that being a mother is the best and most fulfilling job in the world and try to help me recognize that. . . .I know. Charlotte is the best thing that has ever happened to me. She is the most fulfilling job I have been given. But I am still not full. 

In the back of my mind I know that God is the only one who can fill me. In the bottom of my heart I know that until I am longing for Him I will still continue to feel empty. Lonely. Purposeless. 

I guess I just can't wrap my mind around it. I don't just want my time to be full. I want it to have meaning. But meaning escapes all that I do. 

I don't want answers. I know all the answers. 

I want friends. I want people to do life with. I want someone to be the one who seeks out a relationship with me. . . .because I'm tired of being the one who has to always do the looking. 

Not too many people read this blog, but if you happen to see this, please don't pity me or write me with the answers. I don't need any more answers. I just need people to do life with. 

Without Excuse

For many months I have given over to the lie that God is neither present, nor does he want me. I have believed that my prayers bounce off the ceiling. I have seen the actions of people who are loudly proclaiming that they are following Him... And I haven't wanted it. I haven't wanted to try.

There have been a few times when I did try... Did pick up my Bible. Did pray. Did decide to give Him another chance... And then every single time, either I failed or He failed. And I would quit. 

What's the point? 

Well, today, I can't answer that question for you. 

All I can say is that today, I am willing to try again. I am willing to fail. Yeah, sure, I'm scared. I don't want to again prove to myself that the things I know deep inside my heart are lies. But regardless, I am trying again. 

I grew up in a Christian home. I was homeschooled, went to church on Sunday and Wednesday, and did extremely well in Bible Quiz. I know all the right answers. Because of Bible Quiz, I even know a lot of answers no one will ever need to apply in real life. Somehow, though, it seems that no matter how many right answers a person has, one can still grow weary. One can still lose heart. 

Don't get me wrong, I never lost faith. Not completely anyway. I can still fight for the Kingdom as well as anyone. I still remain as passionate as I have ever been when it comes to discussions or when I see that someone is unbelieving. I can encourage other Christians and do all the other "right" things... But inside, I am broken. 

I'm still broken. This post is not an announcement to the world that I have it all figured out. I'm simply writing to tell you where my heart is. It has been too long. I don't know if you remember the posts I used to write... I would write all the time about what God was doing in my life and my heart. 

Lately, I have been writing because I feel like I have to. Each post has come tediously off my fingertips, one painful word at a time. 

Maybe that will change. Maybe it won't. I really don't know. Again, I'm not writing to say I have it all figured out. I'm writing to say that I'm trying. 

Yesterday I decided that I would try again--that I was willing. Today I read countless articles posted by friends on facebook that spoke to where I am. I haven't seen them before. Maybe I have been blind. But today I saw, and today I was touched by the words God had left out for me to find. 

In Romans today, I read chapter 1. I'm starting slow so that I don't burn myself out again. Chapter 1, verses 18-21 spoke a truth that I have been realizing lately. The passage is about God's wrath on ungodliness and how He gives over the ungodly to their desires since He has already made the truth clear to them. Personally, today I take heart at what else the verse says.  

"...since what can be known about God is evident among them, because God has shown it to them. For His invisible attributes, that is, His eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly seen since the creation of the world, being understood through what He has made. [!!!] As a result, people are without excuse."

That is Romans 1:19-20. Emphasis mine... I'm just amazed that we I can go through life with blinders on, saying to myself that God doesn't hear, doesn't see, and doesn't care. This little verse says that he does--and has--since the beginning of time. 

I hope my little epiphany today has helped your heart. I hope that by sharing my struggle I have helped you in yours. I hope God can use these words today to call you back to His heart. Because His heart is OH, SO GOOD. It's only that in this sin filled world it is so easy to lose sight of the things that truly matter... Keep seeing the things that God set before you at the beginning of time. They are there so that we can be without excuse. Look at the things He has made--the sky, the clouds, the flowers, your children--and remember who He is. Remember who you are. 

Just Some News

Good evening, friends. I hope you are all well. Hopefully you are staying cool, also. Here in Michigan we are having record high temps every day. It's been mid-high 90s almost constantly. This wouldn't be quite so bad if I were just one person right now...but as it is, I have heat and exhaustion for two. Thanks to a two-hour long shopping trip this afternoon, I now have a swimsuit that fits over both myself and Charlie. Hopefully this helps the heat a bit by allowing me in the pool and lake over the next five weeks!

Five weeks! Oh dear, it seems so soon! And, my, it seems way too long to wait. Oh well. The nursery is being set up nicely. Joshua was able to bring home a couple of tall bookcases which have become nearly all the storage in Charlotte's room. I had him make a couple of hanging rods between them and they serve a dual purpose--show off her lovely little dresses and stabilize the shelving! We have little boxes and baskets all over the shelves acting as drawers to organize all her socks and outfits and toys... All we need to do now is move out our bookcase of "grown-up" books and move in a crib and hang up a few decorations. I think five weeks should be enough time for that. 

Everyone keeps asking if I have packed my hospital bag yet. No, I have not. People have been asking since 28 weeks. No, I had not done it then, either. I wasn't expecting her to come 12 weeks early. Next weekend is camping, and I need my suitcase for that. Then, I will come home and unpack, and start packing my hospital bag... 4 weeks before I expect to need it. I think that should be enough time...especially considering that Holland Hospital is completely prepared to provide absolutely everything I might need, including 3am meals after delivery and deodorant and toothpaste and shampoo. 

Not much else happening here. I still want a house of my own, so I keep looking. I'll have to stop soon, though, because our lease renews in a week. Sigh... At least then I will have a little bit of stability for 6 months, right? 

I guess that's all! Mostly just waiting around for Charlie to decide she is done being squished. Joshua suggested that if I eat enough it might just push her out... But I think I would have to eat a lot more than I am capable of. Might just have to wait. 

Just a Little Update

Hi all (: 

How's it going? 

For me, it's all good. Mostly. I have no real complaints at the moment. 

We were looking for a house. All options fell through--the last one just this afternoon. But surprisingly, I am ok with that. I don't want to be here in this apartment forever. Truly, I don't want to be here one more year. But it is what it is, and I am thankful for a roof over my head, a family to share it with, and most of all (lately, at least) a working air conditioner. 

In other news, my photo business is slowly beginning to roll forward. I've created five orders for five different customers so far in the wall art division of the business, and am currently in the process of scheduling a wedding and a family photo shoot. It's slow, sure, but I am excited to see where this goes. (: (If you're interested in setting up photos for yourself or a friend, or if you want to order something for your wall, email me at contact.afphoto@gmail.com.)

Other than that, life is basically "normal" on my end. Charlie is growing--about the size of a pineapple now, they say--and never stops moving. She has caused me to gain about 10 pounds in the past 2 weeks. She rarely allows me to sleep, but when she does, I will often refuse to get up until noon. All 17 inches of her little, 4-pound self is constantly wiggling and stretching, making Mama intensely uncomfortable at times... And yet, with all of this, I am so glad my baby girl is growing big and strong. I would never trade this experience over the past 9 months for one with less discomfort or more sleep because it would mean I was trading this special time with my little girl away as well. 

We are currently in the middle of "baby shower week." We were blessed at one on Sunday, and will be blessed with another on Saturday. Half of the empty Pack-N-Play box was filled with tags and packaging from the gifts given by just about 15 ladies. Charlotte, my dear, you are one loved little dear. And I'm afraid you don't have a choice in the matter... you will be dressed in pink and hairbows until you are at least 2.