Just 3 more Months

I haven't written anything in a while, and I have decided it's time to change that. As usual, it's probably a one-time thing, and I will forget to write again tomorrow for at least a month. It's what happens. Life is crazy. 

I really do mean crazy. . . . I got a new job, at Walmart. God bless my boss... He gave me about 35 days off just after hiring me for all the weddings and showers I am required to attend, plan, or take photos at between now and September. I've been designing invitations and programs like crazy. Trying (as hard as I have time to) to get this photo business thing running. Planning my own wedding. Planning bridal showers. Planning and posing for my own engagement photos. Attending premarital counseling. And working Walmart on my "days off". 

People keep asking what I do to relax, and I have to honestly say that I do not at the moment have any time for such things. 

92 days. 3 months. 

I honestly hope everything kind of levels out at some point... but I doubt that will happen before Christmas. 

I have attended only 1 wedding -- Brittany and Dylan, it was a blessing to share your day with you. Brittany, you were a beautiful bride, and Dylan, you face just lit up when you saw her come out from behind the barn... 

And 1 shower -- Andrea, it's been fun getting to know you a little better each time I see you. I am excited to follow you into married life just one month later! 

You know, it's hard being so busy. It's hard getting ready to be married. I don't know that I am ready for this... I don't know if anyone really ever is. I LOVE Joshua with all my heart. But I show it so poorly sometimes. I'm frightened to leave home and comfort...to move on. I find myself shying away from change like a mouse...to anything. 

But Joshua is good to me. He Loves me. He doesn't give up on me. He changes for me. He serves me. He is even learning to dance for me. He picks me daisies. He eats the food I burn and tells me it's just fine--even when it's tomato soup and he doesn't like it to begin with. He holds me when I cry and he is always there when I need him. 

There isn't a reason I should be scared. I just don't like change. Joshua Loves me like he should... like Jesus says.

Now I just need to figure out that Jesus Loves me more than Joshua does. Somehow, that's even harder than trusting Joshua and even harder than change.